"Good" vs. Truth: There is a difference

Optimism and positivity are good things, when rightly understood and applied in their proper context, and not at the expense of truth and reality. That’s one reason why I hate toxic positivity as a whole, and one of its lamest and overused cliches:

Always look for the good in others and in every situation

While I “get” the intent, and while that intent is right in and of itself, “Look for the good”, when it is misunderstood and misapplied, can cause more harm than good because, for one thing, looking for what we term “good” can blind us to potentially life saving truth because our definition of what is good can be superficial, at best, or totally warped and actually evil. Looking only for supposed “good” can also keep us vulnerable and naive. When we’re so focused on superficial goodness, as if it was the highest possible virtue, we fail to see reality. When we take “look for the good” at face value without any deeper discernment or examination, it can blind us to what is actually true about a person or situation because the actual truth is unpleasant, and therefore can’t be deemed “good”.

Here’s one of the realest and perhaps most inconvenient and uncomfortable examples of that.

Abusive relationships: because society as a whole is clueless about how abuse really works, women in dangerous situations are often told to overlook her partner’s faults and look for the good in him instead.

So she does that; she starts saying things “he’s such a good provider,” “he has a great sense of humor,” “he’s really sincere.” “He’s trying really hard.” These are all seemingly “good” things but they fail to acknowledge the truth, which in this case is that he’s threatened her life twice. He humiliates her. He “playfully” puts his hand on her throat.

By seeing the “good” in her partner, rather than the truth, which is that he’s dangerous, this woman may be setting herself up to be killed eventually. That’s the statistical reality of abuse. By choosing to see the truth instead, and acting on it, she can take steps to get help and get out before it’s too late.

This dynamic plays out in friendships and workplaces too, and in so many different ways in society at large. We are constantly making excuses for bad, unethical, addictive, or outright dangerous behaviors in the name of looking for the “good” in people and situations that are fundamentally bad or dangerous. We are so conditioned to “see the good” even when the superficial good is in fact causing us or others great harm, because we refuse to see the truth, or much less act on it.

Focusing solely on the supposed “good” rather than the truth is nothing more than one more manifestation of cringey manmade ideology that tries to pass for truth, though it is not actual truth.

Know the truth and the truth shall set you free. John 8:32.

When you look for the truth, you find the good, if there’s any real goodness to be found. But when you look only for the supposed good, you often miss the truth which is much more important.

Real and objective truth, as found in Jesus and His word, is what what saves, both in our earthly lives and for eternity. Choosing real truth over cheesy mindless cliches can be the greatest good of all.